Being a parent is hard sometimes

Friday, September 28, 2012

Ben has been really into the skate park recently, watching all the skaters at the park before and after soccer practices. He's asked numerous times over the years to go to the skate park and practice, but I've always been iffy about it, and I don't have the chance to take him there often anyway.
We let him bring his scooter and helmet one day after soccer recently, and B and I watched a bit as he rode around before we left to the playground with the girls. Soon after, Ben comes to the playground in a completely different mood, and tells us how he fell straight on his back. He got scared because he couldn't breathe for a bit. Well, he didn't want to play on the playground, or swing, or even ride his scooter around anymore, and I could see he was shaken up. He just sat with us, recovering from his little scare. And we decided then and there that the skate park is not for him and we wouldn't be coming back.
I know I'm kind of overprotective, and my favorite line is "Be careful!", so I try to get over myself and let my kids do things they like.  That's why I wouldn't let Ben play football no matter how much he wanted to. There are so many injuries, and very serious ones too, in that sport. Plus all the concussions and brain injuries that go undiagnosed and unseen. I just don't want that for him, and I don't think the risk is worth it. I'd rather have a happy, healthy child that hasn't known any traumatic injuries.
But sometimes I just don't know where to draw the line. I thought the skate park would be okay, but we realized very quickly exactly how bad the falls can be. Ben's back hurt for a while after he fell, and I know back pain all too well. I don't want that for him.

I want Ben to be active and have fun, but sometimes I don't know whether to say "yes" or "no" to his requests. B saw this guy in the picture above wipe out really bad when his board slid off the rail, and that's just a typical day here.

Parenting involves so much decision-making, some days I just want someone to make my decisions for me so I don't even have to think. All day long I consider the options and possibilities of things--it's a big job. Ben has been wanting to play basketball, so I think a basketball hoop is in order and then we'll get him signed up somewhere. That sport is much more up my alley.



Natalia K said...

It sure is. Hard, that is. And we haven't even gotten to the teenage years yet!!

Natasha of said...

Boys definitely need an avenue to get their energy out; hopefully our little guy will choose a safe sport :)

Anonymous said...

i don't have my own children so i can't even relate to how hard it must be to make these decisions. but i did read an interesting article the other day about risky play and how it can be beneficial to children and how they view the world. of course, to an extent. but if a child can get hurt and realize themselves that they got through it, it gives them more confidence and courage in other areas of life that can be scary. interesting read anyways ...

Tanya M said...

Anonymous, just read the article, it WAS interesting, and I see the point. But it just seems like a broken bone isn't anything to laugh at either. My husband broke his leg as a kid and it aches and bothers him very often to where he can't sleep, and it will be that way all his life. What about head injuries that can't be reversed? I know, I'm a little paranoid... :)

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